10-01-2005, 05:00 PM
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Developer & Designer, News Editor Emeritus
Join Date: Aug 2006
Posts: 12,959
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Gadgetiquette 101
"The underlying assumption is that every moment of time must be filled, if not in actual human interaction or contemplative thought, then by electronic means. It's a perception that gadget makers -- and increasingly, entertainment companies -- are only too happy to exploit. The evidence is everywhere. Board a BART train and count the number of passengers plugged into their iPods and disengaged from the world around them. Sit in a cafe and notice the couples speaking, not to each other, but to other people on their cell phones. This week's Cellular Telecommunications & Internet Association conference in San Francisco was devoted to finding new ways to lay claim to those spare moments waiting in line at Costco or queued for the Southwest cattle call at the airport... It's almost as if, in this media-saturated culture, we're afraid to be alone with our thoughts. For even a moment."
Oh, I'm so guilty of this. If I'm on a bus, a train, out with friends, or even waiting in an airport lounge, there's a high chance that I'll be tapping away on my Pocket PC or talking on my mobile phone at least once. And I'm willing to bet that I'm not the only one. With more and more gadgets being unleashed into the market, it seems none of us can escape this world of digital immersion and are consequently throwing the rules of social behaviour out the door.
Now that the weekend is here, why don't we start by reading this article and then sharing a story or two: are you "plugged" into some sort of electronic device 24/7, or can you happily confess that you follow a strict code of "gadgetiquette" wherever possible? 
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10-01-2005, 05:52 PM
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Neophyte
Join Date: Apr 2003
Posts: 8
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I'm the first to respond? How interesting. My position on the issue is that Emily Post would need to adapt to our changing times; that etiquette has changed over time. I do think physical, non electronic interaction should come before multimedia distractions, ie if you're out with a group of friends, the first priority should be the people there, not the people or games or sports or soaps available via your mobile phone. However, at least in the group of people I regularly socialize with, these things aren't seen as insults. Do people on the morning BART usually talk to each other? If not, what's the problem with some sort of gadget based entertainment? How is it different for me to sit there with my PocketPC reading an ebook while listening to music, or playing a game, than for someone to be reading the paper or a paperback book? And as for the Blackberry thing....if you don't want to do work when you're out and about, and aren't on call, then leave the device at home or in the car. I'm not offended by that. However, I am part of the connected generation, so perhaps my viewpoint isn't shared by those earlier generations.
DF7
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"Chance Favors the Prepared Mind"
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10-01-2005, 05:58 PM
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Executive Editor, Android Thoughts
Join Date: Aug 2006
Posts: 3,233
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I'm reminded of an incident a few years back where I was out with friends and got an emergency page from a client. I used my i-mate Pocket PC to log in to Terminal Services and change the errant permission, then log into the online ticket system and email the client back. It took about 20 minutes and I engaged in conversation while I waited for things to load. At the end of the time, someone made a comment about my being distracted to which I replied "Yes, but if I hadn't been distracted for the last 20 minutes, I would have been racing home to fix the problem thus ending our time out, or distracted for the next 3 hours wondering what the emergency was". So in cases where business is on the line or emergencies, I believe violating social etiquette is acceptable.
However, the following list are things I wouldn't consider acceptable:
1. While out with friends, having one member of the group break away to engage in a 5+ minute conversation of virtually no importance (i.e. "Hello"...."Oh not much, you"....."I'm out with <name>"....."Really?"..... etc... for 10 - 15 minutes while you blankly stare at them)
2. Blatently ignoring a presentation or person speaking to play with your cell phone / PDA (Playing with a cell phone is especially annoying as the presenter KNOWS you're probably not doing anything meeting-related. A PDA at least lets them think you're taking notes instead of playing solitaire)
Item 1 annoys me more than 2, as I have one friend who is a chronic talker. It doesn't help that he leads a very active social life and is normally visiting me away from his home. I can take 1 girl calling him asking how he is and a quick 5 minute conversation. It gets annoying when it's 3+ girls (Or the same girl repeatedly) that tie him up on the phone for 20 minutes, then tie him up on IM for the next 30. Of course, he tends to stop when I reach over and press the power button on his laptop... 
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Dr. Jon Westfall, MCSE, MS-MVP
Executive Editor - Android Thoughts
News Editor - Windows Phone Thoughts
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10-01-2005, 07:29 PM
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Developer & Designer, News Editor Emeritus
Join Date: Aug 2006
Posts: 12,959
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Quote:
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Originally Posted by Jon Westfall
I'm reminded of an incident a few years back where I was out with friends and got an emergency page from a client. I used my i-mate Pocket PC to log in to Terminal Services and change the errant permission, then log into the online ticket system and email the client back. It took about 20 minutes and I engaged in conversation while I waited for things to load. At the end of the time, someone made a comment about my being distracted to which I replied "Yes, but if I hadn't been distracted for the last 20 minutes, I would have been racing home to fix the problem thus ending our time out, or distracted for the next 3 hours wondering what the emergency was". So in cases where business is on the line or emergencies, I believe violating social etiquette is acceptable.
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I've been in that boat. There was once a time when I was alerted to a very important work-related issue that needed attention, so it was my Pocket PC to the rescue. That 5-10 minutes saved me from hours of pain later, and what could have otherwise been a short night out with my friends.
Quote:
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Originally Posted by Jon Westfall
However, the following list are things I wouldn't consider acceptable:
1. While out with friends, having one member of the group break away to engage in a 5+ minute conversation of virtually no importance (i.e. "Hello"...."Oh not much, you"....."I'm out with <name>"....."Really?"..... etc... for 10 - 15 minutes while you blankly stare at them)
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I know a few people who do that. While I've gotten used to it, it's something I avoid doing myself. If I'm on the phone while out, it's usually a quick family-related or work-related call that lasts a minute or two.
It's interesting how much social behaviour has changed ever since phones, PDAs and MP3 players became all the rage.
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10-01-2005, 09:59 PM
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Intellectual
Join Date: May 2002
Posts: 171
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Not quite with friends but
I was at a meeting with a third party when a mnemonic was used that I'd heard before but didn't know what it meant.
Out came the iPaq and bluetooth phone, a quick google and I was away.
As I say, not specifically a social occasion but it helped me out of a spot.
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10-02-2005, 12:39 AM
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Pontificator
Join Date: Jul 2003
Posts: 1,041
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There was a fire a couple of blocks up the street and it took out the power for the entire neighborhood for several hours. It was kinda cool not hearing any of the noises associated with electronics and I got a lot of organization done! It was also nice just to kick back and read and do other non-computer stuff.
Since then, I have designated one weekend a month to be non-connected and computer free. I'm going to work and try to make it every weekend, but that will take some time. I think it's totally possible.
I have a pretty simple rule when it comes to using cell phone/computers and socializing. Never use equipment when you are physically with someone unless it is a real emergency. If your cell phone buzzez (it should be on silent when you are with someone), you can figure if it's an emergency or not. You can always tell the caller you'll get back to them later.
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10-02-2005, 12:58 AM
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Thinker
Join Date: Nov 2004
Posts: 429
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I always have a Pocket PC and a cell phone with me, but I don't use them anywhere near as much as I should. Even in waiting rooms, I often leave it in my pocket. I'm not so sure we're any less connected to society now than before all these portable electronics. 20 years ago, everyone on a bus was reading a newspaper. I don't remember people being friendlier and more open even 10 years ago.
Yesterday, I was in the middle of a QA inspection when my cell phone rang. It was my wife's sister calling me because her other sister was trying to figure out how to work my riding mower. Ugh. That was interesting. The guy inspecting me forgave me.
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Current devices: iPhone 3G. Previous devices: Samsung Epix and 1st gen 32GB iPod Touch BlackJack II, iPaq 6945, iPaq hx4705, Dell Axim x30 high, iPaq 3765.
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10-02-2005, 01:43 AM
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Pupil
Join Date: Aug 2006
Posts: 35
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This is an interesting thread.
I think, however, that the people who use this board are (by and large) representative of another interesting demographic: I could be wrong about this, but the context of some conversations lead me to believe that many of you seem to work in the information technology sector, or at least in some computer-oriented occupation.
As such, I believe that there will always be some sort of disconnect when it comes to what one thinks is acceptable and therefore not considered a breach of any manners.
I'm a physician, and while it isn't uncommon for me to have to be contacted several times a day, I find that I'm able to find a quiet place out of people's earshot to conduct my [brief] conversation. I also think that there are a couple of things going on as well: one, some people aren't truly aware of just how powerful the speakers in their phones are, and therefore tend to raise their voices to unacceptable levels, thereby disrupting the people around them. And two, there is (at least in Manhattan, though I suspect it's everywhere) what I call people's unrealistically high sense of self-importance. That nothing can be done without them having to chime in.
Now, admittedly, I'm only talking about mobile phones. My take is this: as long as what another person is doing doesn't encroach on my right to peace and quiet (such as it is), then I don't really care. It's when people force their conversations on me that I really lose it.
I'm ashamed to admit this, but a few months ago, there was a fellow in a restaurant at the next table yelling into his phone, and disrupting my lunch. When three times I politely asked him to please lower his voice, he made some disparaging remarks which led me to take his phone and remove the battery. Now, as unruly as he was, I clearly overstepped my boundaries and was dead wrong. But this is just a sampling of some of the altercations I have witnessed in my area alone.
What's the answer? I don't know. My feeling is that as long as there's human nature, there'll be abuse on some level.
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10-02-2005, 04:05 AM
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Philosopher
Join Date: Mar 2004
Posts: 555
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To what degree are what the article cited as examples a "detachment" from social interaction? While a cellular phone may "detach" you from your immediate surroundings, it is simultaneously "attaching" you to a surrounding too far for you to otherwise interact with. As far as technology is concerned, it has also enabled many new forms of interaction that simply did not exist beforehand.
Is technology turning us "autophobic"? I do not think so. Humans are simply not used to doing the "nothingness" that the article seems to advocate. Even when you are alone, trying to meditate, you are still trying to achieve some ends. One way or another, we will find ways to preoccupy ourselves during these "spare moments waiting in line at Costco"; perhaps the complaint should be launched towards how one distracts oneself during these moments. Of course, that leads to another can of worms altogether.
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10-02-2005, 04:32 AM
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Linear Mode
