07-07-2004, 12:31 AM
|
|
Sage
Join Date: Apr 2004
Posts: 631
|
|
Dog Haiku
I love my master;
Thus I perfume myself with
This long-rotten squirrel.
I lie belly-up
In the sunshine, happier than
You ever wil be
Today I sniffed
Many dog butts - I celebrate
By kissing your face.
I sound the alarm!
Mailman Fiend - come to kill us all -
Look! Look! Look! Look! Look!
I lift my leg and
Wiz on each bush. Hello, Spot -
Sniff this and weep
I sound the alarm!
Meter reader - come to kill us all -
Look! Look! Look! Look! Look!
How do I love thee?
The ways are numberless as
My hairs on the rug
I sound the alarm!
Garbage man - come to kill us all -
Look! Look! Look! Look! Look!
My human is home!
I am so ecstatic I have
Made a puddle
I sound the alarm!
Neighbor's cat - come to kill us all -
Look! Look! Look! Look! Look!
I hate my choke chain -
Look, world, they strangle me! Ack
Ack Ack Ack Ack Ack!
Sleeping here, my chin
On your foot - no greater bliss, well,
Maybe catching cats
Look in my eyes and
Deny it. No human could
Love you as much I do
The cat is not all
Bad - she fills the litter box
With Tootsie Rolls
Dig under fence - why?
Because it's there. Because it's
There. Because it's there.
I am your best friend,
Now, always, and especially
When you are eating
You may call them fleas,
But they are far more - I call
Them a vocation
My owners' mood is
Romantic - I lie near their
Feet. I fart a big one.
P.S. Yes, I'm aware many are not true Haiku. But still thought they were funny.
|
| |
|
|
|
|
|
|
Threaded Mode