Squirrels: Rats with...attitude...

[Steven Cedrone]

Welcome to my nightmare: I found out that a fat and somewhat happy squirrel has taken residence up in my attic. Well, since the b*stard refuses to help with the mortgage, I decided to evict. Yesterday, I had the wife go up into the attic and chase the little guy out. I then ran outside and re-sealed the area he gnawed through to get in. Now my wife insisted that the squirrel did not get back in while I was getting the ladder...

But I could have sworn I saw a tail darting back inside...

Well, this A.M. I awake to the sound of wood being ripped apart. I have had it, I grab a pellet gun and make a dash outside (note to self: don't go outside in PJ's when the mercury is below the 2 degree mark). So there I am outside in my PJ's with pellet gun in hand...

No squirrel...

Odd...

I wait...

Then I hear it: the familiar ripping of wood. Only, there is no squirrel! We trapped the b*stard inside the attic!!!

Great...

Now I have to worry about how much damage he will do trying to get out. I have set my HaveAHeart traps in the attic, but I fear this guy is just too clever...

So, short of calling in an exterminator, how the h#ll can I get this guy out of my attic???

Steve

[mrkablooey]

Makes me want to buy a pellet gun. All I have is a .357, I'd hate to have to use it to clear a squirrel out of my attic. ;)

[cml]

Steve,
I had a squirrel in my attic last year -- tried everything to get him out, but no joy. Finally, I just happened to spot this electonic item that was supposed to chase away pests, both the bug variety and the rodent variety, while wandering through my local Wal-Mart. I said, "Yeah ... right," but being desperate, I plunked down the $14.99. Came home, plugged it in and haven't heard the squirrel again....

[prismejon]

Our exterminator played an Elvis record at very high volume to get the racoons out of our chimney. Maybe it works on squirrels as well? :wink:

[Jonathon Watkins]

All I have is a .357, I'd hate to have to use it to clear a squirrel out of my attic. ;)

A beuatifull picture. Thank you for sharing that with us! :lol:

On the plus side, who needs aircon with with a well ventilated attic? :wink:

[aroma]

Our exterminator played an Elvis record at very high volume to get the racoons out of our chimney. Maybe it works on squirrels as well? :wink:

He wasn't playing "You Ain't Nothing but a Hound Dog" was he? Might explain why the racoons didn't like it! :)

[Steven Cedrone]

Makes me want to buy a pellet gun. All I have is a .357, I'd hate to have to use it to clear a squirrel out of my attic. ;)

Yeah, well I have other "artillary" at my disposal...

But it would be a shame to kill the squirrel and someone on the next street over when I let loose on him... :snipersmile: :2gunfire: Wouldn't do my attic a whole lot of good either... :wink:

So, quess what I just found??? A very scared little b@stard in one of my traps...

Funny, they don't look so destructive when you have 'em in a cage...

I guess I'll let him live, but he's taking a trip to the park later - although I was looking forward to a little squirrel pot pie... :ninja: :wink:

Steve

P.S. Next time (I really hope there isn't a next time, by the way) I'll try Elvis...

[Jonathon Watkins]

:multi: Cool - a happy ending. :multi:

We like happy endings :way to go:

[Jon Westfall]

Well Children, what have we learned today:

1. Steven hates squirrels.
2. a .357 is not an acceptable squirrel eviction device, a pellet gun is (however, at face value, the .357 looks to be a lot more intimidating and fun).
3. Wal-Mart sells things for $14.95 that at least prevent the sound of a squirrel, but might not actually remove them.
4. Steven hates squirrels.
5. We got to use all those nice violent emoticrons that are never quite appropriate :sniper:
6. Elvis can be used for varment removal.
7. Steven wasn't content to have a blaise b@stard in his trap, he was aiming for the "very scared"... probably because he doesn't like squirrels.

As a whole, this is the best Sunday morning post I've read in awhile...

[Jonathon Watkins]

As a whole, this is the best Sunday morning post I've read in awhile...

Agreed - promote this thread to to the font page! :lol:

Lets see who else has squirrel problems and how they were resolved. :mrgreen:

[Sven Johannsen]

Had a similar problem a few years back. I actually managed to make sure the little critters were out before I sealed up the entry hole.

Currently I have a squirrel problem that I am just letting go. We have some patio furniture that has stuffed cushions on it. The squirrels have apparently decided that the stuffing makes good nesting material. They have pretty much destroyed one of the cushions and are working on the next. The cushions are 10 years old so I have been meaning to replace them anyway. They are fun to watch so I am letting them have at it.

I figure I'll have to get different furniture though, because if I get cushions I don't think the squirrels will know not to get into the new ones.

[Pat Logsdon]

Lets see who else has squirrel problems and how they were resolved. :mrgreen:
A house we were renting several years ago was next to a very large field with a healthy ground squirrel population. They are very very devious. They started out innocently enough, by chewing through 3 plastic trash cans and strewing trash all over the ground.

Then they started digging under the house. Ground squirrels are very good at digging, and they eventually had two nice tunnels under there. It didn't matter what we did - fill the holes with rocks, bricks, etc. They'd always clear the debris out quickly and get back to work.

I even tried an electric fence around one of the holes and around our trash cans, but no dice - they dug under it, or mounded dirt up enough to go over it.

Then they started getting in the house. It was an old house (built in 1905), and had one wall heater that someone had put in sometime in the 50's. For some reason, it had direct access to the crawlspace under the house. All an enterprising squirrel had to do was to find the opening, and crawl out from the little space under the heater to get in the house.

Unfortunately, this was during the winter, and we found out that if we blocked the space beneath the heater, the pilot light would go out, and we would get cold. We also discovered that WE had no way of getting under the house, as a previous remodeller had thoughtfully filled in the human-sized opening with concrete.

This was, of course an invitation to the squirrels, and they used it for all they were worth. They stole fruit from the dining room table. The stole the tubes of hairball remedy for the cats. Where were the cats when all this was happening, you ask? Sleeping. Totally worthless felines. I didn't want the squirrels dead, but the cats could have at LEAST gotten some quality menacing time in.

So how did we resolve the situation? A home improvement company bought the land, tore the house down, and laid down asphalt and concrete for 5 square acres. :|

[sublime]

I'd suggest you watch Tom and Jerry or Warner Brother Cartoons (especially those involving the Road Runner) and get ideas from there. The most common solution (and most preferred by experts) is to put some food outside the hole (Tom used to put cheese, but a squirrel is not a mouse, duhhh) and wait for the bastard to stick his head out. As soon as he does, BLAAAOOWW him with your heavy mallet.

It's that simple

[Steven Cedrone]

1. Steven hates squirrels.

Hey, I don't hate squirrels...As long as they stay the heck away from the inside of my house... :wink:

Steve

[Steven Cedrone]

I'd suggest you watch Tom and Jerry or Warner Brother Cartoons (especially those involving the Road Runner) and get ideas from there. The most common solution (and most preferred by experts) is to put some food outside the hole (Tom used to put cheese, but a squirrel is not a mouse, duhhh) and wait for the bastard to stick his head out. As soon as he does, BLAAAOOWW him with your heavy mallet.

It's that simple

I'll remember that... The next time I'll buy myself an Acme Squirrel Trap©... :wink:

Steve

[Jon Westfall]

I'd suggest you watch Tom and Jerry or Warner Brother Cartoons (especially those involving the Road Runner) and get ideas from there. The most common solution (and most preferred by experts) is to put some food outside the hole (Tom used to put cheese, but a squirrel is not a mouse, duhhh) and wait for the bastard to stick his head out. As soon as he does, BLAAAOOWW him with your heavy mallet.

It's that simple

No no no, the most common solution is to push enough TNT into the hole to blow China off the map, and light it while putting your fingers in your ears...

Hilarity ensues...

And Steven, sorry for my "hate" statement ;)

Lastly, So how did we resolve the situation? A home improvement company bought the land, tore the house down, and laid down asphalt and concrete for 5 square acres.

Sounds a bit extreme to me, but I bet it taught them a lesson.

[Steven Cedrone]

I could easily see myself pulling a "Mouse Hunt"... (http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0119715/)

So obsessed with ridding my house of "critters", I wind up destroying my own house (and when done, the squirrels build a new home out of the wreckage and laugh at me)... :wink:

Steve

[Kati Compton]

Well, it's over for now, so you should stop worrying. ;)

[Janak Parekh]

Well, it's over for now, so you should stop worrying. ;)
Yes. And if it happens again, you should hire Kati's cats. I'm sure they're perfect for the job. :razzing: ;)

--janak

[mrkablooey]

Glad it worked out! I'd rather the squirrel live, too. They're pests, big time, but the poor things just don't know any better. :)

[Steven Cedrone]

Yes. And if it happens again, you should hire Kati's cats. I'm sure they're perfect for the job. :razzing: ;)

Believe it or not, someone told me to throw a cat up in the attic... :lol:

Steve

[David Prahl]

My grandpa (the same one who shot grackles front the kitchen window in his PJs) used a 12 gauge in his attic for 'coons. I never did hear if it damaged the house ( 8O ).

I'd open up his little hole again and try to get him to go out.

[Steven Cedrone]

I'd open up his little hole again and try to get him to go out.

He has been caught... :way to go:

Steve

[Pat Logsdon]

So how did we resolve the situation? A home improvement company bought the land, tore the house down, and laid down asphalt and concrete for 5 square acres.

Sounds a bit extreme to me, but I bet it taught them a lesson.
I'm not so sure about that. I wouldn't put it past them to invent little jackhammers and backhoes to build a thriving metropolis under the Lowe's Home Improvement Center.

I really do feel bad for them, and all the other animals (coyotes, rabbits, etc.) that the development left without homes. I would much rather have kept living there, but unfortunately we didn't have much of a choice as mere renters. :(

[JackTheTripper]

The only difference between rats and Squirrels is Squirrels have better marketing.

[maximus]

I'd open up his little hole again and try to get him to go out.

He has been caught... :way to go:

Steve

You did not do any harm to the little innocent animal, right ? :mrgreen:

[Steven Cedrone]

You did not do any harm to the little innocent animal, right ? :Green:

Nope, I let him free in a nearby park...

Steve

[Jonathon Watkins]

Nope, I let him free in a nearby park...

Good man, now someone else can have the same fun as you did. :lol:

[Steven Cedrone]

Good man, now someone else can have the same fun as you did. :lol:

Share the love (and the squirrels)...

That's what I always say!!! :wink:

Steve

[JustinGTP]

We had a muskrat in our garage once.. and this won would let you touch it and it didnt do anything,

plus, when we opened our garage (driving up our 300 ft long driveway) you would see the little muskrat try to run in the garage again by the veranda lol :D

-Justin.

[Pat Logsdon]

Share the love (and the squirrels)...
I'm sorry, but all I can see is a circle of hippies passing a squirrel around saying things like "Can I have a hit of your squirrel" and "Don't bogart my squirrel!" :mrgreen:

[lonesniper]

The only difference between rats and Squirrels is Squirrels have better marketing.
LOL that cracked me up. Sounds like a Scott Adams Dilbert line to me.

[ctmagnus]

Here's a question: What do squirrels in the attic sound like? We had some clicking (sounded like something dropping metallic objects onto plywood) in our roof last summer.

[JustinGTP]

(sounded like something dropping metallic objects onto plywood)

Yes, those are called droplets.

[Steven Cedrone]

Here's a question: What do squirrels in the attic sound like? We had some clicking (sounded like something dropping metallic objects onto plywood) in our roof last summer.

If they were inside, you would definitely hear them running around!

Steve

[ctmagnus]

(sounded like something dropping metallic objects onto plywood)

Yes, those are called droplets.

:confused totally:

[ctmagnus]

Ah. Likely not squirrels then. It was a clicking-thunking kind of sound coming from one spot in the ceiling/roof (no attic here) for 3 1/2 months.

[Jon Westfall]

I can't believe someone resurrected this post. I still think it was one of the best posts of all time here. :snipersmile:

[Kati Compton]

Here's a question: What do squirrels in the attic sound like? We had some clicking (sounded like something dropping metallic objects onto plywood) in our roof last summer.

If they were inside, you would definitely hear them running around!

We *thought* we had something in the attic, but it turned out that crows like to hop around and eat their prey on our roof...

[Stik]

Excellent squirrel bait. :way to go:

http://jennifer.mehaffey.com/squirrel.jpg

[Jonathon Watkins]

Excellent squirrel bait. :way to go:

:rotfl: This thread keeps getting better!

[Mark Kenepp]

Well Children, what have we learned today:

1. Steven hates squirrels.
2. a .357 is not an acceptable squirrel eviction device, a pellet gun is (however, at face value, the .357 looks to be a lot more intimidating and fun).
3. Wal-Mart sells things for $14.95 that at least prevent the sound of a squirrel, but might not actually remove them.
4. Steven hates squirrels.
5. We got to use all those nice violent emoticrons that are never quite appropriate :sniper:
6. Elvis can be used for varment removal.
7. Steven wasn't content to have a blaise b@stard in his trap, he was aiming for the "very scared"... probably because he doesn't like squirrels

Add to that:
8. Droplets sound like metallic objects dropping on plywood (Credit to Justin :wink:)
9. Crows like to hop around and eat their prey on the roof (Credit to Kati :wink:)
10. Squirrels like beer (http://jennifer.mehaffey.com/squirrel.jpg) :beer:

:rotfl: This thread keeps getting better!
Indeed! add up all of the above and you get Quality Entertainment :popcorn:

[JustinGTP]

"Coming to a Thoughts media Site Soon"

[Jon Westfall]

I just re-read this thread after a few months... I think it truly was an example of what the deep freeze of winter can do to people... from the hippies passing squirrels to the .357 references... wow.

And some quite witty things from the posters formerly known as Surgical Snack and PDA Gerbil... ;)

[maximus]

I just re-read this thread after a few months... I think it truly was an example of what the deep freeze of winter can do to people... from the hippies passing squirrels to the .357 references... wow.

And some quite witty things from the posters formerly known as Surgical Snack and PDA Gerbil... ;)

Hmpf ... Their staff recruitment process needs to be seriously strengthened to ensure proper filtering of bad apples.

:mrgreen: :wink:

[Jonathon Watkins]

I just re-read this thread after a few months... I think it truly was an example of what the deep freeze of winter can do to people... from the hippies passing squirrels to the .357 references... wow.

And some quite witty things from the posters formerly known as Surgical Snack and PDA Gerbil... ;)

Hmpf ... Their staff recruitment process needs to be seriously strengthened to ensure proper filtering of bad apples.

:mrgreen: :wink:

Maximus, Bad Tinky, Bad, bad Tinky! :twak: :lol:

Cheers Dadarkmcse, we try to please! :wink:

[Jonathon Watkins]

They are baaaaaaack! (http://www.theregister.co.uk/2005/05/11/readers_squirrel_stories/) You just can't keep the evil squirrels (http://www.scarysquirrel.org/special/hitension/) away! 8O

[stevelam]

Quick time to resurect this thread. It's just too darn funny to lock away.

:rotfl: :rotfl: :rotfl: :rotfl:
:rotfl: :rotfl: :rotfl: :rotfl:
:rotfl: :rotfl: :rotfl: :rotfl:
:rotfl: :rotfl: :rotfl: :rotfl:

It's really helped me to get through the day.

[Jonathon Watkins]

Any more for any more? :D

[Stik]

Any more for any more? :D

This may be nuttier than squirrel dung, but recent news of squirrel attacks in the US and England prompted me to resurrect this thread once again. :twisted:

http://www.nbc10.com/slideshow/news/9958535/detail.html?qs=;s=13;p=/news/;dm=ss;w=400

Who you looking at buster?

http://www.nbc10.com/slideshow/news/9958535/detail.html?qs=;s=11;p=/news/;dm=ss;w=400

[Mitch D]

Any more for any more? :D
Who you looking at buster?

http://www.nbc10.com/slideshow/news/9958535/detail.html?qs=;s=11;p=/news/;dm=ss;w=400

I wouldn't be as worried about this guy, it's the 6 behind you that are looking to jump you for your camera so they can sell it off to get money for nuts. :twisted:

[Stik]

" children should not eat squirrel more than once a month, pregnant women should limit their intake to twice a month, and adults should not eat squirrel more than twice a week."

http://www.nydailynews.com/front/breaking_news/v-pfriendly/story/491824p-414296c.html

Also use extreme caution if the squirrel your to consume for dinner glows in the dark! :wink:

http://i52.photobucket.com/albums/g19/jessekb15/radioactive-squirrel.jpg

[ricksfiona]

To beat your enemy, you must know your enemy... This one is easy... They are scavengers right? Heck, place a piece of food with some wicked poison in it.. Some nice rat poison available at most hardware stores will do nicely... Problem solved within a few days... Now if I can only figure out how to catch my neighbor putting his garbage into my garbage can...

Yes, it's cruel. Hey, it's better than the .357 or shotgun stories here... But I'm old school, live in the 'burbs AND there are plenty of trees outside for them to build their home. Squirrels seem smart enough to know that they shouldn't be in your attic. Especially when someone is chasing them with a broom and such.

But if you move into a new house which was built where REAL wildlife use to roam... Like bobcats and such... I'm rooting for the bobcat! :twisted:

I'm surprised no one brought up Caddy Shack... When Bill Murray's character tried to napalm the gophers tunnels... :twisted:

I remember going to Mexico as a kid with my parents and staying with relatives.. One of my uncles allowed this spider to grow to HUGE proportions.. He allowed it to stay in the corner cause it kept the flies away... Hey, it's a little town in Mexico where you usually get your morning eggs from the hen house outside... Anyway, me, my brothers and sister were terrified of the thing and my mother convinced my Uncle to throw the spider out. He didn't want to, but he did throw it out... Wasn't happy about it, but the flies were.

[Stik]

Your thoughts and story were very humorous ricksfiona, thanks! :D

Please excuse my editing of those thoughts as I would be remiss as a horticulturist/ amatuer ecologist and protector or most all of God's little creatures ( except RATS!! :evil: ) that the ' Entity ' chose to co-inhabit the earth with us. Most of these creatures are doing what comes natural to survive, and a disruption of the ecological system in place could virtually lead to what some would know as the ' Butterfly Effect ' once eradication meausures go into effect. The wolf population ( or de-population if you will ) in North America makes a fine example of this.

Its the human species, Homo sapiens sapiens, unfortunately, that do and have always done the most flagrant damage and destruction to this home and fragile eco-system we call Earth.

With that said...

One of my uncles allowed this spider to grow to HUGE proportions.. He allowed it to stay in the corner cause it kept the flies away... Anyway, me, my brothers and sister were terrified of the thing and my mother convinced my Uncle to throw the spider out. He didn't want to, but he did throw it out... Wasn't happy about it, but the flies were.

Glad your uncle just let the spider out of the house instead of swatting him dead. Spiders of all shapes and form may be scary and things that nightmares are made of but are very beneficial insects whose diets consist mainly on prey that are not quite as beneficial ( except as a food source ) such as flies, gnats, cabbage moths, mosquitos etc., etc. .

Yummm!!

To beat your enemy, you must know your enemy... This one is easy... They are scavengers right? Heck, place a piece of food with some wicked poison in it.. Some nice rat poison available at most hardware stores will do nicely...

The means that you suggest would work nicely! However, one would take the chance that this method could also poison and kill other creatures that the bait wasn't intended for... like your neighbors dog! :byebye:

In defense of squirrels, and I admit to liking squirrels, it would turn out that " hardwood nut trees, like the walnut, oak, and hickory that provide food and shelter for a number of other forest species that can't depend on other types of trees would be put in harms way witout the squirrel. In other words, the shift ( destruction ) in the squirrel population could start a chain reaction that could radically alter what's left of the worlds forest ecosystem. " *

* Source -Rob Swihart, Wildlife Ecologist at Purdue University, Indiana, USA.

Grey squirrels ( unlike red squirrels ) do plant tree seed that they plan to eat later, but in many instances forget where some of their cache's are buried.

End effect? A new tree is born! :hippy:

Hope this all doesn't sound too ' nutty ' to you! :mrgreen:

[Stik]

BTW, ( and fwiw ) my most favorite squirrel scenes's in cinematic form can be had at, where else, YouTube. 8)

Willy Wonka & the Chocolate Factory

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mLcJMMmPQ8c


National Lampoon's Christmas Vacation

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HYkhv-RAIBA