Log in

View Full Version : 'H' 'E' Double Hockey Sticks


JackTheTripper
07-14-2003, 05:25 PM
Quote: "A thermodynamics professor had written a take home exam for his graduate students. It had one question: 'Is Hell exothermic (gives off heat) or endothermic (absorbs heat)? Support your answer with a proof.' Most of the students wrote proofs of their beliefs using Boyle's Law (gas cools off when it expands and heats up when it is compressed) or some variant. One student, however, wrote the following: 'First, we need to know how the mass of Hell is changing in time. So, we need to know the rate that souls are moving into Hell and the rate they are leaving. I think that we can safely assume that once a soul gets to Hell, it will not leave. Therefore, no souls are leaving. As for how many souls are entering Hell, let's look at the
different religions that exist in the world today. Some of these religions state that if you are not a member of their religion, you will go to Hell. Since there are more than one of these religions, and since people do not belong to more than on religion, we can project that all people and all souls go to Hell. With birth and death rates as they are, we can expect the number of souls in Hell to increase exponentially. Now, we look at the rate of change in the volume in Hell because Boyle's Law states that in order for
the temperature and pressure in Hell to stay the same, the volume of Hell has to expand as souls are added. This gives two possibilities: #1 If Hell is expanding at a slower rate than the rate at which souls enter Hell, then the temperature and pressure in Hell will increase until all Hell breaks loose. #2 Of course, if Hell is expanding at a rate faster than the increase
of souls in Hell, then the temperature and pressure will drop until Hell freezes over. So which is it? If we accept the postulate given to by Ms. Therese Banyan during my Freshman year, `that it will be a cold night in Hell before I sleep with you,` and we take into account the fact that I still have not succeeded in having sexual relations with her, the #2 cannot be true, and so Hell is exothermic.'" -Anonymous

Jason Dunn
07-14-2003, 05:38 PM
:lol:

aroma
07-14-2003, 05:59 PM
:rotfl: :pimp:

GoldKey
07-14-2003, 06:32 PM
:twisted: :lol: :twisted:

dean_shan
07-15-2003, 04:14 PM
Where did you find that?

Kati Compton
07-15-2003, 04:16 PM
Very cute. :)

Janak Parekh
07-15-2003, 04:28 PM
Sigh, I'm unlucky enough to have seen this before... :cry: dean_shan, this is one of the many jokes circulating around the internet. A quick :google: search yields (http://www.google.com/search?q=hell%20exothermic%20endothermic&sourceid=mozilla-search&start=0&start=0&ie=utf-8&oe=utf-8) about 3,500 matches.

The version I saw, though, didn't name the girl; it was something like "cute girl down the hall" or something like that. Actually, looking at the Google matches, it seems people splice in the girl they were fantasizing about. :lol:

--janak

Steven Cedrone
07-15-2003, 06:53 PM
Sigh, I'm unlucky enough to have seen this before... :cry: dean_shan, this is one of the many jokes circulating around the internet.

I'd rather see it show up once in the forums instead of 187 times in my inbox... :wink:

Steve

aroma
07-15-2003, 08:10 PM
I'd rather see it show up once in the forums instead of 187 times in my inbox... :wink:

AMEN!

Janak Parekh
07-15-2003, 08:12 PM
I'd rather see it show up once in the forums instead of 187 times in my inbox... :wink:
AMEN!
Well, that's why I finally unsubscribed from almost every humor list. I used to use 'em back in '95 when they were in vogue... now it's just pathetic.

--janak

JackTheTripper
07-15-2003, 11:26 PM
Where did you find that?On BARF. (http://bayarearidersforum.com/forums/showthread.php?s=&threadid=35909)

Just thought it would do a lot better here.

And yes, I'd rather read it on a forum than in my inbox. :)

dean_shan
07-16-2003, 07:33 AM
Sigh, I'm unlucky enough to have seen this before... :cry: dean_shan, this is one of the many jokes circulating around the internet. I guess I don't search for jokes that much. Don't tell me it's a realy old joke.